November 4, 2009

Remembering November 4, 2007 – The Accident

Posted in Disability, Prayer Request, Stories tagged , , , , , , , , , , at 10:41 pm by Sarah Bosse

Today is the two-year date of my accident on November 4, 2007, at nearly 1:30pm.  It’s a difficult day for me, but I’m doing alright.  In some way I remember the accident daily.  It impacts every day by adding physical pain to what I had already experienced from fibromyalgia, birth defects, osteoarthritis in some joints, stress fractures, and other problems.  Every time I wince or my back spasms, it’s a reminder of what happened on that day.  My back has almost constantly been hurting since that day (minus two months, ending about this time last year, of full relief – what a miraculous rest I enjoyed, provided by God!). 
I also think about how God really spared me a lot of harm from that accident.  If you had seen the car afterwards, you would know that I was definitely protected by the hand of God.  Sometimes I wonder why He didn’t take my life on that day and bring me Home to New Life with Him.  I often wonder if the pain will ever go away, at least during this lifetime.  Could I have prevented the accident by being more diligent while driving?  I honestly don’t know.  But I often battle this creepy little guilt monster that tells me I should have done things differently.
There was some encouragement that came out of the wreckage, however.  I remember very clearly how near He was to me as my car flipped over in ‘slow motion’ and I was utterly powerless to control the situation that I felt would surely lead to either my death or dismemberment.  God wanted to show me that everything was in His hands. 
So many complete (hundreds, I dare say?) thoughts in just milliseconds raced through my mind as my car started to go airborne.  “I cannot do anything!” I thought to myself.  As that thought left my mind, it was replaced with another, more comforting thought.  “God, you’re in control now and I’m not.  I need your help.” 
 

Suddenly, as if I had been removed from my car which was headed for a tree, I was ‘transported’ back to my Occupational Therapy class at Pitt Community College, where Mrs. Haithcock was lecturing about car accidents and telling students that drunk drivers are often less seriously injured in vehicle accidents because, like sleeping drivers, they are relaxed and not bracing for impact.  Bracing for impact and tightening skeletal muscleture is frequently what causes the impact to break bones and cause soft tissue damage.  During that lecture, I remembered thinking to myself, “I wonder if it is possible, during an emergency situation like a car accident, to make your muscles relax to avoid injury?”  I don’t remember if I ever actually asked the question or not; probably not. 
As my car began to flip, I snapped back to the situation I was currently in.  I was very aware of what was happening around me and the fact that I was flipping over and that the brakes were utterly useless at this point.  I believe I shouted audibly “GOD, I CAN’T!” meaning “I can’t relax my body right now!  I’m afraid!”  God did not speak audibly back to me, but He spoke so clearly in my spirit that it wouldn’t have been any more convincing to me had he spoken audibly…and He said, “You’re right; you can’t, but I can.  I can make you relax.  Now relax your body, relax your muscles.”  And I immediately became like a ragdoll as the car threw me violently over and over, without my body resisting. 
I counted myself flipping around three times.  Witnesses counted “at least four times”.  In any case, I landed upside down.  But by the time I landed, I had no idea which way was up…nor the fact that I was “down”.  My car had landed upside-down in a ditch, the back window somehow hanging up high in a tree, the back end having smashed sideways into a tree at nearly full force (55 mph).  People I had met just that day came to get me out of the car.  If the accident had happened a mere week from that day, I would have drowned.  We had been experiencing a drought, but the next week it rained and poured, and that same ditch was filled to the top with water.  It took too long for me to get out of the car, and with the back window having been popped out and the other windows cracked and “holy,” there is no way I would have made it had I been in that accident seven days later…save for another miracle. 
*Deep sigh.*  Yeah, a lot has happened through and since that day in 2007.  Dreams have had to be drastically changed.  Life has become more challenging in many ways.  The one thing I need to give God for Christmas is an “easy” button.  I think Staples has them on sale during the Christmas season.   Of course, I’m just joking.  For God, nothing is impossible.  But that doesn’t mean He’s guaranteed to take the shortcut route. 
 
At the end of the day, I won’t be able to figure out all of God’s reasons for why he allowed the accident, protected me through it, allowed the consequences of it to last for 2 full years thus far, and what He desires to continue to do through it to change my heart and life for His glory, etc.  The answers are too big for me to understand, and chasing them down is basically like chasing the wind; it won’t get me anywhere.
 

I like what Joni Eareckson Tada said:

“Rather than answers, I believe God wants you to see Jesus as the Answer.  He’s the One who holds all the reasons in His hand.  And having His hand to hold onto through this difficult time is enough!”

 
 
So I Will Trust You
 
Almighty Maker, Universe Shaper,
You put the stars into space,
yet You descended, You have befriended
those who had hated Your name, just like me.

Chorus:
King of Glory, I know You love me,
so I will trust You.
Yes I will trust You.
God almighty, You have saved me,
so I will trust You.
Yes, I will trust in You.

Lord over nations, King of Creation,
heaven and earth bow to You.
I am Your child, I’ve been reconciled,
with tender affection You drew me to You.

Chorus

Bridge:
How could I not trust my King,
the One who has formed me and shaped me?
I will rejoice and will sing,
for the One who has made me has saved me.

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1 Comment »

  1. Lulu said,

    What a beauiful testimony of the goodness and mercy of our Lord and Saviour.


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